I miss a friend(?), who almost seems a very old friend now. I miss how I spoke about almost anything with her, how I could be stupid when I wanted, without worrying if I was wasting what could be "quality time. "
A lot of things would seem fake in retrospect, but a lot things really were not.. fake. As I thought about some really testing times, which again I'm sure would seem affected, I couldn't believe how much I really had blown away. It really doesn't seem to make sense suddenly, and so I force myself into thinking about the bad parts of it just to convince myself that it was ok to blow it away. But really, it wasn't. It costed me way more than just one very good friend. I wont even go into the loser's world of "If I had another chance, I'd do things differently... "

Talking about "old friends", now I've had some truly great friendships back home in Hyderabad. But I've realised.. they're just not like me. I am close to only a few people, but I really hold tight to them, they're for the keeps, they're not just people who where at the same place and time as me. Also I believe friends are people who know the current you, not someone whom you made your "best friend" in 6th grade and never talked to him after 8th grade. My friends in hyd.. i dont know.. they seem so busy all the time, too busy for a 5 min call in a year, I can count the number of phone calls I've received (apart ofcourse from family) ever since I came here, and no its not coz I've been talking to them online either. At times I just wished one of them would think of me and call, without any "work".. you know.. just call, like I do out of the blue, cos maybe I miss them? Its not like I'm perenially terribly disappointed in them, or I'm mad at them, I'm not even blaming them... its never been that important there, I'm sure they'd ensure I had a whale of a time if I went there now, but then again.. there'd be nothing until probably I went back. I'm sure they still consider me one of their own, I haven't changed all that much since I've gotten here, but I shouldn't hope for effort... I should just be content knowing they still like me, and knowing that I'd have never-ending tales to tell them when I get back home.

Thank you orkut... because of you, they cant escape lookin at my face for too long :)
C'mon guys... I can't get there anytime soon, but I sure miss u guys like hell.. and you too, my lost friend. I hope you're doin well...

Forgive my growing alliance with country music.. but there's this song by Rodney Atkins called "These are my people"..